Self-esteem
- The facts
- How the media affect children
- Celebrity culture
- Pressures at school
- How you can help
- David's story
The facts
Television, the Internet and teen magazines are great sources of information and entertainment for young people, but they can also influence kids' self-esteem in a variety of ways. While children are increasingly media savvy, they still need parental help with learning from the media and keeping media messages in perspective.
How the media affect children
There's no doubt that children are influenced by what they see in the media, and that includes advertising. Television adverts often include music, humour and "wackiness", all of which appeal to children from an early age. One study showed that children who live in countries with lots of television advertising are more likely to ask their parents for products shown on television. And while the jury is still out on exactly how violence on television and in films affects children, many experts agree that, in some circumstances, it can make children more aggressive.
Children can also be emotionally troubled by what they see in the media. When your child finds something upsetting, talk to them about their feelings. Help your child to distinguish between fantasy and things that happen in real life. For real-life events, it may be enough to reassure them that while bad things happen, what he or she has seen is unlikely to happen to them. In some situations you and your child may also be able to offer practical help such as donating to a disaster relief fund or a charity.
Many experts feel that children are simply spending too much time watching television, playing video games and surfing on the net. This means they have less time for different leisure activities such as reading, socialising and sports, which develop other skills and maintain good health.
Celebrity culture
Many parents are concerned about the media's promotion of the "perfect" body. In a survey, nearly half of young women said that pictures in magazines affect the way they want to look. The only way to overcome this is to explain to your child that the models, actors and other stars they see in the media only look that way because they have a huge entourage of stylists, hairdressers and personal trainers who are paid to keep them looking their best. It's also worth pointing out that photographs are often manipulated and airbrushed by computer to make media stars look even more perfect. So what young people yearn to attain may be a fiction anyway.
Pressures at school
A study of 13-19 year olds found that many young people no longer see a link between education and success, preferring to sit back and wait for a lucky break to come along. Some experts put this down to our obsession with reality TV and celebrities who appear to achieve success without doing much work for it. You can help your child by explaining that only a very few people find success this way and that many celebrities - David Beckham included - actually have to work very hard to get to the top of their field.
You may also find that your child feels pressured to have certain clothes, foods or toys advertised on TV because "everyone at school has them". This can be very hard to resist, but if you have good reasons for not buying your child something - if it's too expensive, for example, or your child is too young - stick to your principles, but do explain your reasons. If you would rather not say no to everything, perhaps ask your child which item they would most appreciate and purchase it as and when you can - an official football shirt, a certain brand of training shoe or a designer top.
How you can help
There are plenty of ways you can help your child use the media safely and wisely.
- Restrict television viewing to a shared room where you know what they are watching, rather than giving your child a TV set for his bedroom.
- Watch television together, and talk to your child about the programmes you watch.
- Discuss advertising on TV. Ask your child if he knows what the adverts are for and, if not, explain that they are trying to sell him products.
- Suggest your child looks at TV listings, picks out programmes he really enjoys and then turns the TV off afterwards.
- Make sure younger siblings have an opportunity to see programmes that are designed for their age-group, as well as watching with their older brothers and sisters.
- Make time for family activities, such as visits to the park, shopping, meals out and day-trips which allow you time to talk and interact with each other.
- Read younger children a bedtime story before bed, rather than letting them fall asleep in front of the television or a video.
- Take an interest in your child's internet use, even if you don't understand it.
- Keep computers in a shared area of the house rather than letting your child have one in his bedroom.
- Discuss images of models and celebrities in magazines and point out how different media imagery is from real life.
David's story
David Hill, father of six
"At the moment, I'm trying to get my eight-year-old to be more selective about her television viewing. She is turning into a bit of a couch potato and I'd rather she turned the TV off and did some reading or came to talk to me. One of my problems with the media now is that the children are used to being constantly entertained and, if something isn't immediately entertaining, then they are at a loss. I'm not a fan of girls' magazines because they give girls the message that unless you are completely preoccupied with boys and pop-stars then you are not in the game. They also promote a very narrow definition of what is attractive and beautiful. In general, I think too much exposure to the media discourages children's sense of adventure and curiosity. You have to teach your children that there's a whole wealth of experience and knowledge out there that is worth having."