Children with dental phobia
Real stories: Evie’s experience
Evie has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and Autistic Spectrum Disorder (ASD), which means she can get quite anxious about visiting the dentist. Before getting her braces fitted, the Bupa Dental staff spent some time with Evie. Evie asked questions about the procedure, and the staff gave her the support she needed, helping her feel more at ease.
Transcript
How long will you have your braces for?
Two years.
Did the staff make you feel comfortable?
Yeah, especially India.
How often do you have to go to the orthodontist?
Every eight weeks.
What is your favourite drink?
Prime is my favourite drink.
Did the orthodontist talk you through what was going to happen?
Yes, they did.
What is your favourite tornado?
The Tri-state tornado.
What is your favourite animal?
My favourite animal is an elephant.
What is your name and how old are you?
I am Evie and I'm 12 years old.
Can you choose the colour of your bands?
Yes, and I'm going to get silver, a gold, and then rainbow
after that.
Do they have to tighten your braces?
Yes they do.
They do it every eight weeks,
but you get to pick lots of fun colours.
Did it hurt when you had your braces fitted?
No, but it did a little bit afterwards.
You just need to take a medicine like paracetamol
or something.
Do your braces hurt all the time?
They do every now and then, but
It will just ease off.
Do you look forward to going to the orthodontist?
Not always, but it's always fine when I get there.
Were you nervous when you first went to the orthodontist?
I was, but then they reassured me
and walked me through what was happening.
What is the walking man tornado?
It is a tornado that has little cyclones coming out of it,
and it looks like it's walking.
Can you tell me a joke?
What's the best time to eat bacon? Friday!
What did the team at Total Orthodontics do to make you feel comfortable?
The way they reassured me
and how they did it at the pace that I was comfortable with.
What is in your hands?
This is Johnny the Orange for ADHD.
It makes me feel good because it feels really squidgy.
What advice do you have for anyone that may be feeling anxious?
The orthodontists aren't scary.
You just need to ask them if you need it at your own pace
or if there's something you need done
to help you, just ask.
Why are children scared of the dentist?
Children are among those most struck by fears and phobias surrounding their visits to the dentist.
The Dental Law Partnership1 believes that dental phobia is a reason why up to two of every five children avoid visiting the dentist for scheduled check-ups.
More often than not, the fears of dentistry in children begin at home. Parents and caregivers often forget that their formative experiences of dentistry were from a different generation.
Indeed, their own childhood fears were most likely informed by their parents, whose trips to the dentist as youngsters may have been from a radically different era of dentistry. This often causes adult’s fears and negative memories to inform the way they speak to their children about going to the dentist.
Transcript
Who are you?
I'm Pete Birch, area manager for Bupa Dental Care
and dad to Evie.
How did you choose the right orthodontist for your daughter?
That predominantly is decided by Evie and how she reacted.
So when she first met her orthodontist,
I knew that wasn't the right one.
So I knew we had to find one that she was comfortable with.
What did the dentist do to reassure you that they were right for your daughter?
For me, the orthodontist made me
feel comfortable as a father.
The moment I saw Evie relax,
you can see it in her shoulders, see it in her face.
She engaged with Evie.
She made Evie part of the appointment, part of the journey,
and if anything, left me out.
And that for me was brilliant,
just watching Evie interact
and finally want to be part of it.
How nervous does Evie get before an appointment?
Evie can get really nervous.
It's obviously anxiety,
it's part of her ADHD, part of her autism,
and it can be even a positive event.
So it can be a party, it can be something
that she's wanting to do.
And it can also be dental appointments.
It can be doctor's appointments,
and she will work up an idea of what it's meant
to be in her head, and that can just be overwhelming
for her.
Does your daughter look forward to going to the orthodontist?
Yes and no.
So when she's prepared, when she knows what colour bands
that she's going to have next, she's genuinely excited.
We've had four appointments so far,
and we've only had one where when we arrived, she
absolutely did not want to attend that appointment,
which is still a huge difference to previous experiences
of getting Evie to appointments.
Was the interaction with you or your daughter?
The interaction is very much with Evie, so obviously
as her parent, I have to be involved in some of it,
but predominantly it's about talking to Evie first
and then me second if needed.
But it's with Evie, it's watching Evie look India
straight in the eyes, who's the orthodontist,
and just seeing her being ready for the next steps,
being talked through what's happening.
Did you just go with the first orthodontist saw?
No, the first orthodontist that Evie saw
pretty much treated her like any other patient,
wasn't necessarily wrong,
but wasn't interested in Evie,
so was just ruder in the face,
measuring up, checking her teeth.
Didn't really engage with Evie,
and I could see Evie's face, her reaction, her body language,
that says this isn't the orthodontist for her.
So I knew that we had to find a one that she was comfortable
with so that we could get her to all of her appointments.
What was important for you when choosing the orthodontist?
For me, the most important criteria was
who Evie felt comfortable with,
and that didn't matter to me,
therefore, distance, price within reason,
and it didn't matter how convenient
or inconvenient it was for me as a parent to get her there.
If I knew that I had to travel far,
but was guaranteed that when Evie got there,
she felt comfortable to engage
with the appointment and take part,
that was the most important criteria.
How important was it that they communicated with your daughter rather than you as a parent?
It's huge.
I guess there are always points within this journey
that a parent has to be involved,
but through what's happening to Evie, what Evie's going
to have to participate in, it's really important that
that's directly put to her.
And again, that was never needed to be directed
or prompted by me.
I never had to bring Evie into the conversation.
If anything, I would have to insert myself just to be nosy.
Did the experience ever feel rushed?
Only in the first appointment.
So the first appointment that we had originally with
who we were referred to,
it was very much just we had a appointment time,
a chair to sit in
and we needed to be out for the next patient.
So the experience for us wasn't about us,
it was about getting ready
for the next patient and the next patient.
So it very much felt rushed, which is why
it was really obvious that Evie wasn't part of it.
Evie was just the product, the who we are going
to give a brace to.
What was your experience like booking your initial appointment?
So with booking the initial appointments,
it's done almost on your behalf.
So through a referral pathway,
you are just advised when the appointments are,
that they contact you, you just agree to the dates.
When we knew we needed to take control of this following
that first referral, it was really easy.
It was finding out where we wanted to go, who we needed
to see, and we would just make contact
and the appointments were what worked for us.
And again, huge difference.
Did you always know what options were available to Evie?
No.
So I think going into anything where it's for your kids,
you hope that the GP, the dentist, the whoever,
is always presenting you with all of your options.
So when you're not presented with an option,
I guess you would assume that there isn't one.
I'm obviously privileged enough to work
for Bupa Dental Care, so I know
that there are options available to any patient,
and therefore we knew when we were referred with Evie
and that it didn't feel right, we knew
that we could take control of that pathway, part of
that appointment and get her seen by who we wanted to.
How important was the team in helping your daughter feel comfortable?
For me, it's really important.
The teams, the receptionists, the practice manager,
the nurse, and they are all part of the appointments
that Evie will be part of, whether that's with me,
with her mum, and when we get there,
they engage with Evie.
And that again, is really important for me
because I'm not the one that's got to sit in the chair.
I'm not the one that's going to have
fingers put in my mouth.
She's got to want to let these people do it.
So when they are all part of
inviting Evie into the practice, saying hello, greeting her,
looking her in the eyes even as a 12-year-old girl,
it's just wonderful.
How do you reassure Evie?
Reassuring Evie is, I guess, I get
to pull on the I'm your dad element of our relationship.
So she knows that I'll never put her in any
deliberate harm's way.
The other part of reassuring Evie is then just going
through it with her.
So being with her, I can't give her any false promise
that things won't hurt, that won't be stressful,
that won't be scary.
But if I can just let her know that I'm right there, I'm
with you, and we'll be able
to reflect on it and talk about it later.
She'll normally be able to find the bravery in herself
and get through.
What impact has finding the right orthodontist had on your daughter?
On Evie? Huge.
Because Evie doesn't often look forward to things,
even things that may be exciting.
So to come away from an orthodontist appointment
and almost have your daughter in the car
saying, can you take a picture?
Can you send it to me? I want to send it to my friends.
When am I going next?
Gives you feelings that words don't always describe,
but they are definitely feelings of pride.
Proud of your daughter for having braces
and feeling good in them, but proud
that you've made a good choice
and that there are people out there that want
to make a difference to the lives of people that
they may never see after these two years.
What makes Total Orthodontics (part of Bupa) so special?
For me, it's about the people without a doubt,
and it's the values that drives them.
So we have brave, responsible, and caring.
And I've worked for other businesses
before that are all value driven.
It's values on a paper, it's on a poster.
It's what you're made to read as part of your induction.
But in Bupa, it's different.
It's absolutely the core belief
of everybody that works there.
It's the intent and it's the drive that
how do you help someone else?
And for me, that means that the experience that Evie
and I have with India is not unique, so
that it can only be experienced by who you know.
I think it's that great feeling
that whoever you see within Bupa, you know you're going
to get that same experience.
What impact has finding the right orthodontist had on you as a father?
It's a huge impact.
So although the appointments are eight weeks apart,
although this is just one of many appointments that Evie has
to attend, or school things that she has to go to,
everything can be a battle with Evie and her autism
and her ADHD.
So it can be something that's really anxiety driven
for her, anything that we plan.
So knowing that we've got something that's really important,
that we can almost guarantee that when we get there,
she'll take part in it.
It's just in, I guess
it relieves me of any pressure or stress,
and that is worth more than anything.
What advice do you have for other parents whose children may be feeling anxious?
I guess for me, as a parent, it's already incredibly hard for me
to always be aware of what Evie needs or what Evie wants.
So when I know that there are certain actions
that I can take that make a difference, it's making sure
that I do, it's being disciplined in making sure
that the preparations, I don't change them
for my convenience or change them
for other people's convenience.
If I need to be inconvenienced, so be it.
And that can be quite difficult
because we are taught to do things the way we want to.
So having a child is
already a task in itself.
One with anxiety, ADHD
and autism means that you just got
to make those extra steps, but they're worth it.
Do you struggle to get your daughter to appointments?
Yeah, it can be a real struggle.
So it's not just appointments.
It can be anything that we are planning on
doing as a family.
And it can be, if we plan far enough ahead,
we can get Evie prepared, but that doesn't always work out.
Weather can change, plans can change.
People that are coming with us can change
and that can completely destroy
Evie's preparation for an appointment or an event.
She's missed school opportunities.
As a result, she wanted to go play football.
They were going to go to the local stadium.
She couldn't go because it changed.
So having something that is constant
and has a level of continuity is really important.
Did the orthodontist make adjustments for Evie's autism and ADHD?
Not as a result of me having
to advise them in the first instance, the orthodontist
that we absolutely just knew we could trust, already
took the time to engage directly with Evie, understands
that different children have different needs and once,
and was able to really quickly identify
that Evie had particular needs within her appointment
and engaged directly with her, talked her
through the appointment, but almost in reverse order.
So the bit that Evie was looking forward
to the most was having to pick coloured bands.
In particular, she wanted red, green, and blue,
and that was what they got her to pick first
and then talked her through what order was going to happen
to build up to getting the bands put in.
What to do if your child is scared of the dentist
At Bupa Dental Care, we understand that going to the dentist isn’t always top of kids’ wish lists for a fun day out. But not only is it an essential part of maintaining excellent oral health, it shouldn’t be an unpleasant, stressful or anxiety-causing experience.
Start from a young age
The fear of the dentist is sometimes nothing more than the fear of something new and unfamiliar.
Most experts agree that a child should visit the dentist by their first birthday, or when their first tooth appears.
Set a positive example
A recent survey by dentalphobia.co.uk stated that 53% of British adults are anxious about the dentist, with 17% being put off completely2.
While it might not always be easy, it’s best to put on a brave face in front of your kids prior to your next appointment.
Set realistic expectations
Children don’t respond well to feeling tricked into encounters that may not be what they expected.
Let them know that it might not always be comfortable in the dentist’s chair. However, let them know that nothing bad will happen and that they need to take care of their teeth.
Read or watch stories together
Spend some time in the weeks leading up to their appointment reading or watching stories, and creating positive associations.
We’re particularly fond of Peppa Pig’s trip to the dentist, and We’re Going to the Dentist by Campbell Books and Marion Cocklico.
Play dentist games
If there’s a dentist appointment on the horizon, play a game and let your child take on the role of a clinician and integrate it into a fun activity.
It can provide plenty of opportunity to talk to them about the importance of dental health.
Try and see the same dentist every time
If possible, try and speak to your local dentist to ensure your child sees the same person each time.
They’ll be able to build a familiar relationship, which will help them look forward to their visits.
Talk to your dentist in advance
Dentists are going to be able to do their important job more effectively if your child is comfortable and happy to be there.
Is your child passionate about dinosaurs? Unicorns? A particular series of books or cartoons? Dentists know that engaging a child on their favourite subject is a quick and effective way to get them feeling better.
Schedule sensibly
Every parent or caregiver knows that their child or children’s moods will change throughout the day. They’re more likely to be anxious when they’re already tired, hungry or over-stimulated.
You can make dentist appointments less scary by scheduling them in the morning after a good sleep, or after a nap.
Keeping calm in the dentist’s chair
At Bupa Dental Care, our skilled and experienced professionals know that happy children make fantastic patients.
They have all kinds of fun ways to make sure little ones feel comfortable throughout their patient journey.
Book an appointment
Search over 350 private and NHS dentists and book an appointment that suits you. Online booking now available.
More family support with dental care
Being sedated at the dentist
Information about sedation types and techniques that could help with a visit to a dental clinic.
Worried about the dentist?
If you’re worried about making a visit to your dentist, you’re not alone. Find the answers to the questions you might have before you book.
How Bupa can help you and your family
Get in touch
If you’re nervous about seeing the dentist, please contact your local Bupa Dental Care practice.
You can let the staff know about your concerns and they'll talk you through your options.
Bupa Smile Plan
Bupa Smile Plan provides cover for routine dental care. Spread the cost of check-ups and hygiene appointments across 12 monthly payments.
Bupa Dental Care treatments
Find out more about dental treatment and how we can help you maintain your oral health.
1 Dental Negligence Solicitors in the UK | Dental Law
2 https://www.dentalphobia.co.uk/
Bupa Dental Care is a trading name of Oasis Dental Care Limited. Registered in England and Wales No: 00478127. Registered office: Bupa Dental Care, Vantage Office Park, Old Gloucester Road, Hambrook, Bristol, United Kingdom BS16 1GW.
Oasis Dental Care Limited has a number of trading names including Bupa Dental Care. For a list of all our different trading names please follow this link.
