How to support someone with OCD
Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) can be very distressing. It can also interfere with someone’s day-to-day life. If you’re close to someone with OCD, you may be wondering how to best support them. Here we explain what OCD is and how to help a loved one with the condition.
What is OCD?
Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is a mental health condition that can affect both children and adults. People with OCD often have obsessions and compulsions. An obsession is an unwanted repetitive thought. A compulsion is a repetitive behaviour or ritual.
Someone with OCD may act out compulsions in order to try to ease the obsessive thoughts. These thoughts are not in their control and can cause high levels of anxiety and distress. Some may feel they need to hide their OCD from others.
What are the signs of OCD?
OCD symptoms may include:
- constantly checking things, such as if you have your keys with you
- being scared of contamination from dirt and germs
- washing hands and showering very often
- touching things in a certain order or at a certain time
- avoiding people, things or places that make you anxious, such as not leaving the house
- withdrawing from others, even within your household
- repeatedly asking people for reassurance that you’re okay
- feeling that something bad may happen if you don’t carry out routines or rituals
- feeling distressed when interrupted or unable to complete routines or rituals
- being occupied or distracted by intrusive thoughts (which can be violent or sexual)
Tips for supporting someone with OCD
If you live with someone with OCD, you might find their behaviour confusing or frustrating. But remember that they’re trying to cope the best they can. Here's a list of ways you can support a loved one with OCD.
- Learn more about the condition. By understanding OCD better, you can get an idea of what your loved one is going through.
- Avoid going along with their compulsions. Say no to taking part in rituals or checking.
- Encourage them to see a doctor or therapist if they are struggling and offer to go with them.
- Help find distractions for when urges become difficult. This could involve going on a walk or starting a fun activity.
How to help a child with OCD
If your child has OCD, this can be hard for them. They may feel incredibly anxious and embarrassed. OCD can also interfere with their schoolwork.
Here are some coping strategies that may help make things a little more manageable for them. If you’re concerned about OCD-like traits, you can also seek support from your child’s GP, school nurse or local children’s services.
What is OCD?
OCD is an anxiety disorder that consists of obsessions and compulsions.
Someone with OCD may experience unwanted repetitive thoughts. Often accompanied by high levels of anxiety, a sense of responsibility and guilt.
If you notice that your child is suffering with OCD, here are some coping strategies that might help.
Coping Strategies
Having a traffic light system enables your child to share a colour picture that represents an emotion without necessarily having to speak about how they're feeling.
The worry jar, enables the child to visually see the once the worry has been addressed. It doesn't need to be worry any longer.
A brave jar, allowing your child to focus on a positive thing they have achieved that day. This will help promote increased confidence and self-esteem.
Keeping a diary of what they were doing when they began feeling anxious, helps to identify what triggers these feelings. Also teaching them how to manage these situations in the future.
Using Ice
Using ice, having your child hold a couple of ice cubes in their hands, helps the mind focus on the sensation of coldness, rather than any distressing thoughts or feelings.
Grounding techniques are a coping strategy, which help you feel reconnected with reality.
The following can help young people to feel back in control of their emotions.
Grounding Techniques
Tell yourself you're safe. And that these feelings will pass.
Acknowledge five things you can see.
Acknowledge four things you can touch.
Acknowledge three things you can hear.
Acknowledge two things you can smell.
If you don't have the right things around you to complete the steps just mentioned and ask yourself questions such as where in the world is cold?
Traffic light system
Have a ‘traffic light system’ in place. This includes your child using three pictures to share how they are feeling without having to speak. Each picture will represent an emotion. Your child can either hand this to you, point to it, place on their bedroom door, or in some cases share with you via social media.
Worry jar
A worry jar allows your child to visually see that once the worry has been addressed, it doesn’t need to be a worry any longer. Write the worry down and then put it in the jar.
Brave jar
A brave jar allows your child to focus on a positive thing that they have achieved that day. Write down the achievement and pop it in the jar. This will help promote increased self-esteem and confidence.
Keep a diary
Keeping a diary of what your child was doing when they started to feel anxious can help identify what triggers these feelings. This can also help your child learn how to manage these feelings and situations in the future.
Use ice
Give your child a couple of ice cubes (or plastic ice cubes) to hold in their hands. This can help them focus on the sensations of coldness, rather than any distressing thoughts or feelings.
Grounding techniques
Grounding techniques are coping strategies which help you feel reconnected with reality. The following can help young people feel more in control of their emotions.
- Tell yourself you’re safe, and that these feelings will pass.
- Focus on five things that you can see.
- Focus on four things you can touch.
- Focus on three things you can hear.
- Focus on two things you can smell.
If you don’t have the right things around you to complete these steps, then ask questions such as: where in the world is cold?
Individual support plan
Writing up an ‘individual support plan’ may help you and your loved one to understand how they want to be supported. Below are some questions you could include.
- How can I help myself when I’m feeling worried or distressed?
- What positive distractions can help me at this time?
- How can I let my family know that I’m struggling? What signs may I show?
- How do I want to be supported? What things will I find helpful and unhelpful?
When supporting someone who has OCD, remember to also look after yourself. Try not to take too much on. Share the responsibility of supporting your loved one with others if you can. By protecting your own mental health you’ll be in the best place to help someone else.
Too much on your mind?
Speak to a Bupa GP about your mental health with appointments available seven days a week. No insurance needed.
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Sources Sources
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder. Summary. BMJ Best Practice. bestpractice.bmj.com, last reviewed February 2026
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder. Epidemiology. BMJ Best Practice. bestpractice.bmj.com, last reviewed February 2026
- Obsessive-compulsive disorder: What is it? Clinical Knowledge Summaries (CKS). cks.nice.org.uk, last revised February 2024
- What is OCD. Mind. mind.org.uk, published October 2023
- Symptoms of OCD. Mind. mind.org.uk, published October 2023
- Helping someone with OCD. Mind. mind.org.uk, published October 2023
- Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and Related Disorders in Children and Adolescents. MSD Manuals. msdmanuals.com, last reviewed October 2025
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