Feeling lonely?
Everyone feels lonely sometimes. But if you’re feeling isolated and sad, it’s time to find some support.
Loneliness can really affect your mental health, so we’d like to help. There’s information and support for you here even if you’re not a Bupa customer.
Coping with loneliness
Feeling lonely isn’t trivial, but it’s usually very difficult to admit. It can be about being isolated but there are other causes, too. Some people don’t see enough of their loved ones, or their relationships aren’t fulfilling. If you’re not getting enough contact, or the right kind, it can lead to mental health conditions such as depression or anxiety.
The signs of loneliness can creep up on you. For example, you might not remember when you last laughed or spoke to anyone. You might feel disconnected even when you’re with others. If this is your normal, you might benefit from some support and advice in coping with loneliness.
Are you an older person who’s feeling lonely?
If you or someone you know is feeling lonely, Bupa Buddy is here for a chat. We understand that it can be tough to self-isolate or be away from your family. So why not make yourself a cup of tea and give us a call? You don’t even have to be a Bupa customer.
Look out for the signs of loneliness
The signs of loneliness can vary. Here are some you might recognise:
- Feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy
- A sense of detachment from the world
- Struggling to enjoy hobbies, food or your work
- Finding it difficult to be in company and avoiding others, perhaps feeling shy or clumsy
- Having difficulty putting your worries into perspective
- Being poorly more often and not sleeping well
- Looking for comfort in alcohol or shopping
Enjoy your own company: take a mindful walk with our 15-minute podcast
Bupa’s Dr Meera Joshi will guide you through a 15-minute walk while practising mindfulness. It’s a recognised technique for tackling feelings of low mood. You don’t need any mindfulness experience to do this.
Is your teenager feeling lonely?
It’s not always easy to tell what a teenager is thinking. They may find it difficult to admit they don’t have many friends, or that they feel like they don’t fit in. But if they’re spending a lot of time alone or not going out much, it’s normal to feel concerned. Our article has some useful tips, and there’s our helpful video about teenage loneliness.
Teenage years are a tricky time, and identifying if something is wrong can be difficult.
If your child is spending a lot of time alone, it's natural to wonder if this is okay, a passing phase, or if it's something that you should be concerned about.
Some things that may cause loneliness and isolation could be screen-based activities.
These play a big part in our children's lives.
There are lots of positives linked to watching TV, gaming or using social media to connect with friends.
But it's been estimated that screen time can vary between two to eight hours a day for young people.
And they may continually compare themselves to others online, which can lead to feelings of isolation.
Changing schools, moving from primary to secondary school or from college up to university.
Feeling misunderstood and having a sense of not fitting in, even when surrounded by people.
Being left out of sports or academic teams.
Changes to their mental health or wellbeing or managing a mental health condition.
Living with a long term condition or disability.
Being bullied.
How do you know if your teenager is lonely?
It's important to recognize that young people don't have to be socializing all the time and value time on their own.
But they can be good at hiding how they feel.
So it might not be easy to spot clear signs of loneliness.
Some signs that your child might be feeling lonely and isolated include: developing low self-esteem and losing confidence in themselves and their abilities, being sad, withdrawn, and pulling away from others, getting angry and upset, not wanting to try or do new hobbies or social activities or drinking and smoking in a bid to feel accepted.
Tips for talking to your teen.
Take the lead if you feel that something is wrong.
A gentle nudge might help them to open up.
Show your child that they can lean on you for support.
It can be distressing hearing your child is struggling, but it's important to keep calm, listen, and be understanding.
Set up a safe space where you'll be able to have a conversation, such as on a walk or at home when no one else is around.
Bear in mind that the evening might not be the best time if you and your child are tired.
Natural conversation starters might arise.
For example, if you're watching TV together and something relevant comes up.
Perhaps ask their advice about a problem a friend is dealing with.
Or, if it feels right suggest you'd like to talk to them about something directly.
If your child is defensive, unreceptive or clams up, take a break, but return to it again in a few days time.
You might find that they come to you when they feel ready to talk.
A conversation is a two-way thing.
And listening to your team is important.
Encourage them to ask questions and share some of your experiences to show that you understand.
Try and ask questions that require more than a yes or no answer.
There might not be a simple way to help, but just making sure they know they can trust you, that you're always there for them and that you love and care will help them feel supported.
Support for feeling lonely from Bupa’s experts
Our wellbeing platform, Healthy Me, is where you’ll find a wide range of help in coping with loneliness.
If you’re in a crisis or just need some help, don’t hesitate. Here are some really helpful organisations that you can turn to for support.
Samaritans
When life is difficult, Samaritans are there – day or night, 365 days a year. Whoever you are and whatever you’re facing, they won’t judge you or tell you what to do. They’re there to listen so you don’t have to face it alone.
Call free day or night on
116 123 (UK and ROI)
Mind
Mind is a charity dedicated to mental health. They exist to make sure no one has to face a mental health problem alone. They’ll listen to you and offer support and advice.
0300 123 3393
Lines open 9am to 6pm, Monday to Friday, except for bank holidays
Young Minds
YoungMinds is the UK’s leading charity for children’s and young people's mental health. You can text Crisis Messenger for free 24/7 and get support from trained volunteers who are supervised by experienced clinicians. Texts are free from most major mobile networks.
For urgent help, text YM to 85258
Mental Health Foundation
This charity helps people understand, protect and sustain their mental health. The ‘Your mental health’ section has lots of useful content, including podcasts about mindfulness and overcoming anxiety.
Mental health support as part of Bupa health insurance
I’m already a Bupa health insurance customer
If mental health is included in your Bupa health insurance, we can refer you to a consultant or therapist, and you may not even have to see your GP first†. Or we can put you through to one of our mental health nurses.
0808 256 1766^
^Calls may be recorded and to maintain the quality of our service we may monitor some of our calls, always respecting the confidentiality of the call.
I’m not a Bupa customer, but I’m interested in health insurance
If you’re looking for mental health support as part of a broader health insurance policy, we can look after you, your family, or your employees.
†Any onward referrals for consultations, tests or treatment are subject to the benefits and exclusions of your cover. Please check your guide and certificate for further details or contact us to check your availability.
Bupa health insurance is provided by Bupa Insurance Limited. Registered in England and Wales No. 3956433. Bupa Insurance Limited is authorised by the Prudential Regulation Authority and regulated by the Financial Conduct Authority and the Prudential Regulation Authority. Arranged and administered by Bupa Insurance Services Limited, which is authorised by the Financial Conduct Authority. Registered in England and Wales No. 3829851. Registered office: 1 Angel Court, London EC2R 7HZ.
